Buffy and Giles worked out for a couple of hours in the spare room. Buffy used it to work off her tension. It was also one of the few things she’d done recently that let her forget. She had to focus so completely on the training that she couldn’t think of the other night.

When they finally called it a day Buffy felt much better. Not only because she’d had a few memory free hours but also because she’d taken a huge step here.

She thanked Giles and took a shower.

She was healing well. Her pain was almost gone, just a slight twinge now and then.

While she showered she thought about what else she could do. She felt empowered and didn’t want to stop. She decided the next thing that she needed to do was see Riley.

She wasn’t sure how it would go but she felt she could handle it now.

As she came out of the shower she called him and arranged to meet him that afternoon.


Angel smiled as Buffy came down stairs. She was smiling a genuine smile, something he’d missed the last few days.

“You look good.” He said. He couldn’t smile back at her, he was too ashamed of the things he said earlier.

“I feel good.” Buffy paused for a second. “Look, thank you… And just so you know. I know you didn’t mean any of those things. You were trying to help me. And I don’t agree with your methods.” She admonished. “But I have to say they worked.”

She took his hand reassuringly.

“Good. I’m glad.”

Buffy went to get something to eat from the fridge. “Oh, I called riley, he’s coming over later.”

“He is?”

Buffy turned back to him, nibbling on a chicken leg. “Yeah, I asked him to. One more thing out of the way.”

“That’s… that’s good.”

“Yeah, it is.” Said Buffy as she almost skipped through into the dining room to see Willow and Giles.

Angel didn’t like it. She seemed too happy. OK, he knew exercise could produce feelings of bliss but he hoped she wasn’t going too fast and wouldn’t come crashing back to earth again.

He also had to admit he was a tad jealous.

He cast his feelings aside though. If Buffy thought she was ready then she would have nothing but his support.


Riley arrived with a bouquet of flowers. Buffy still seemed to be on her high from earlier.

She took the flowers. “Aww, their beautiful. Thank you.”

Riley leaned into kiss her. Buffy stiffened and turned her cheek to him for him to kiss instead.

“I’m sorry.” Riley apologised.

“No, it’s not you Riley.” Buffy put he flowers down on the hall table. “Come on, let’s take a walk.”

(above on yahoo)
Chapter 15

“What about the T225?” asked Willow.

Angel wasn’t listening though. He heard Buffy and Riley leave and was worried. Not about Riley but about Buffy. He knew how hard the walk yesterday had been and hoped she would be better able to cope today.

“Angel?” Willow asked again.

“Sorry?” he turned back to Willow.

“The T225. It’s the smallest tracer in the world.”

“But getting it on to him and his people will be nearly impossible without giving ourselves away.” He looked to Giles for conformation.

“I agree. No, as helpful as this research is Willow I think old fashioned surveillance is the way to go.”

Willow looked glum but she knew they were right. “OK, so we should come up with a rota to watch the place then.”

“Yes, indeed.” Said Giles.

“Cordelia and Wes will be here to help by tonight, they’re bringing a surveillance van with them.”

“You have one of them?” asked willow, thinking it was a cool thing to have.

“No, but I know a billionaire who does.”

“Oh, OK then.” Said Willow slightly confused.

“David Nabbit was a client. He likes these kinds of toys.” Angel clarified for her.

“You know David Nabbit?” asked willow, slightly envious. “Oh wow. I would so like to meet him. What’s he like?”

Angel didn’t tell her why he had hired them, to cover up evidence of his visiting a demon brothel. Why shatter her illusions.

“Could we just get back to it.” He said.

“Sure.” Said Willow pouting. “Mr-I-Meet-Stars-all-the-Time.”

“Willow.” Admonished Giles.

“OK, OK, got it.” Said willow. “Work work work. Slave driver.”


Buffy’s mood altered drastically when they went outside. She felt exposed again and walked with her arms crossed over her chest, defensively.

“So, how have you been?” asked Riley.

“OK.”

Riley tried a number of times to get through to her but he didn’t receive much in the way of answers.

Once they reached the park he stopped her and turned her to face him.

“Buffy, I don’t know what to do here. It’s like your shutting me out.”

“I’m not. Not intentionally.”

“I know that. I just want to help.”

“I know. I know you do. I just…” her words trailed off.

Riley leaned in to kiss her again. Buffy let him. Maybe that would stop him being so inquisitive.

“See, it’s all going to be OK.”

Buffy tried to smile but she couldn’t. Like a kiss would solve everything.

He seemed to think it had though and took her hand to continue the walk.

Buffy tried to resist the urge to pull her hand away and wrap it protectively around her. She walked with him through the park.

They walked quietly. Riley enjoying the scenery, Buffy looking for danger.

Then they heard a scream. Buffy pulled her hand away from Riley and hugged herself as she looked for the source of the scream.

“It’s OK. Just some kids.” Said riley pointing out four children having a water fight.

“Oh.”

Riley stood in front of her again and tilted her head up. “Nothing to worry about.” He said planting a gentle kiss on her lips.

Buffy pushed him away.

“I cant riley. I’m sorry.”

Riley looked like a wounded puppy.

“It’s not you riley. Honestly.”

“But it is me. It’s me your pushing away Buffy. No one else.”

“I know. But it’s not something you did that makes me push you away. It’s not your fault… It’s mine.”

Riley sighed and sat on a bench.

“So, what do we do now?” he asked as Buffy sat beside him.

“I don’t know.” She said quietly.

Neither wanted to say what was on their minds. A relationship was impossible at the moment.

Finally riley voiced his thoughts. “Buffy. If you want space, just say so.”

“It’s not that.”

“Then what is it?”

“I… I just can’t do the relationship thing right now. I can’t worry about someone else’s feelings. I’ve got too many of my own just waiting to boil over.”

Riley nodded. “It’s OK. I understand.” He was silent for a minute. “If you decide you are ready for a relationship again, call me. I’m not going anywhere.”

He got off the bench and walked away leaving Buffy alone.


Karl watched Buffy as she sat alone. Soon she got up and quickly walked back the way she had come, looking about herself warily.

He followed her back to her home.