Chapter 20

Over the next weak things carried on. Buffy trained with both Angel and Giles daily building up her strength and accuracy.

She went for a walk every day with one or other of the gang. At times Angel wished with all his soul that he hadn’t destroyed the Gem of Amara so he could accompany her.

Tabs were still being kept on Leonard and Karl, and another two minions had been identified. One was Don Russell, another ex student; the other was an unknown vampire. They were sure there were more miions in the house, they just couldn’t be sure how many.

Every time Buffy went out, she went with an invisible entourage. One of Leonard’s men followed her and one of the scoobies followed him.

Angel was sure Leonard was getting upset by now. His let on the house had only been two weeks so he was being pushed off schedule. Karl returned the next week with another vile of poison. The cameras as well as Angel watched him this time.

Riley came by once that weak to see Buffy. She was friendly but still closed. They parted as friends.

At the beginning of the next week Buffy went back to college. She didn’t go to all her classes but it was a step in the right direction.

She arrived home at lunchtime the first day in tears. Even though no one knew about her she felt like they looked at her differently. And there were so many people. She cried for a long time and Angel comforted her until her tears dried.

“You did it.” He said when her weeping finally subsided.

Buffy sat up and nodded.

“It can only get easier from here.” He reassured her.

Buffy smiled. It was a nice thought.

She attended about half the classes that week. She trained more than the previous week. It gave her a small sense of power.

A combination of Willow, Tara, Anya and Xander escorted her everywhere. Angel insisted she not be left alone since Leonard was probably getting angry by now and might try and have her kidnapped.

Buffy didn’t like going back. Every day she got home and cried silently in the bathroom. Angel knew what she was doing but he never mentioned it, which she was grateful for. It was easier as Angel had said but it still wasn’t easy. It probably never would be easy again.

Angel was now sleeping in the spare room just across from Buffy’s room. Buffy insisted both doors were left open though so she could call to him if she needed him.

She often had nightmares and Angel comforted her. Frequently she couldn’t sleep again without the sleeping pills. She didn’t want to become reliant on them though, so she and Angel often just sat in her room, talking until the day arrived.

Xander and Willow helped her though her panic’s at college. Everyone had been issued with a Tazer gun. It would floor a human assailant in seconds and badly stun a vampire. They were more a security blanket than an actual weapon though, a precaution.

Buffy still hadn’t ventured out at night. Nor could she. Angel knew as soon as she left the house Leonard would be on her. Karl had returned again that week to poison Buffy’s juice this time, so Leonard expected Buffy to still be weak but even with that advantage and an entourage protecting her, Buffy wouldn’t be 100% safe. And she would never feel 100% safe again.

She refused to leave after dark. Angel didn’t blame her. He didn’t want her to leave either. However, this situation couldn’t go on indefinitely. They had to have some kind of plan.

Angel had an idea and the gang went to work getting the information and implements they would need.

When Angel first suggested it Buffy flatly refused to have anything to do with it.

“I cant. I can’t see him again.” She said through tears.

Angel understood how she felt. “I know it’s hard but if you don’t confront him he’ll haunt you forever.”

“No. You bring his ashes back, that’s enough for me.” She said defiantly.

“Is it?” he asked. “Will that make the nightmares go away? Will that stop the fear? Will it stop you seeing his face everywhere?”

Buffy knew he was right. She began to cry harder. “But I cant.” She wailed.

Angel didn’t try and convince her again he just comforted her. She knew she had to do this and Angel had faith she would agree.

The next day she agreed to discuss it. She became upset again and Angel let the matter lie once more. When Buffy was ready they would go forward in the planning. Not before.

The third day Angel explained in full what he had in mind. Buffy listened closely. Although her eyes misted over she didn’t cry.

It was a good plan. She just wasn’t sure she could pull her end of it off.

They continued making plans, discussing every detail of the operation. Every possible outcome. Buffy was terrified every time they spoke of the plan, Angel could tell by her rapid heart rate.

She was getting better at controlling it though.

A week after he first suggested it they were ready to put it into action.

The night before Buffy asked Angel to stay in her room again. To stay in her bed with her.

Angel wasn’t keen but Buffy pleaded. “Angel. I really don’t know if I’m going to make it through tomorrow night. I just really need someone to hold me tonight. Please.”

Angel agreed and held her as she slept. He had made her take sleeping pills so she would get some rest but it was a restless sleep. Angel could tell she was having bad dreams but at least she didn’t wake up. She would be rested if nothing else.